{FMF} Lift

lift{Five Minute Friday is a five minute free write on a prompt given each week.
There is no editing, no overthinking, no looking back. Just write.}

This week’s word is lift. In a world full of people ready to tear others down, I prefer to lift them up. It does not hurt me any at all to help someone along. Someone else’s success does not hinder me in anyway.

We should all be supporting each other and celebrating together! We should lift each other up in every victory, no matter how small, and celebrate them. It costs us nothing to lift someone else up!

“Therefore comfort each other and edify one another, just as you also are doing.”
1 Thessalonians 5:11

Let’s spread positivity and encouragement to all of those around us! Let us lift up one another and make a difference in their world!

Blessings,

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{For more information on Five Minute Friday click HERE.}

{FMF} Hidden

Hidden{Five Minute Friday is a five minute free write on a prompt given each week.
There is no editing, no overthinking, no looking back. Just write.}

This week’s word is hidden. I have been toying with this word all day. Did I want to talk about how hidden I felt about my anxiety? Did I want to talk about those who may feel hidden from God? I wasn’t sure. And to be honest, I’m still not. I am thinking of a combination of both.

Obviously, until a few months ago, I felt very “hidden” with my anxiety. I didn’t open up to anyone outside of my immediate circle (and even some within). I was going through this fight in hiding. I was embarrassed and I chose to stay off the radar. I was trying to grasp my own reality without taking on the burden of helping others deal with me. So, yes, I felt very hidden from everyone. There were days I would literally sit in the house with the curtains drawn. You can’t get more hidden than that!

And this led to times of feeling hidden from God. Like I was left behind. My problems weren’t big enough to catch his attention. People are starving and dying. That is much more important than my little anxiety issue, right?!? Not to God. He wants us to come to him with everything. Everything. Whether it is cancer or a sliver. Whether it is the brink of homelessness or an unexpected bill. He wants to hear it all from us. He is always there. Always standing in front of us waiting to hear.

No matter how we feel, we are never hidden from Him.

Blessings,

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{For more information on Five Minute Friday click HERE.}

{FMF} Protect

Protect{Five Minute Friday is a five minute free write on a prompt given each week.
There is no editing, no overthinking, no looking back. Just write.} 

This week’s word is protect. I have been super busy this week and coming up with some awesome words, profound or otherwise, has escaped me.

I look for my protection from the Lord and have all my faith in Him to provide. So instead, I have been drawn to Psalm 91 and I will post it below.🙂

Psalm 91 (NKJV)

91 He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High

Shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress;
My God, in Him I will trust.”

Surely He shall deliver you from the snare of the fowler[a]
And from the perilous pestilence.
He shall cover you with His feathers,
And under His wings you shall take refuge;
His truth shall be your shield and buckler.
You shall not be afraid of the terror by night,
Nor of the arrow that flies by day,
Nor of the pestilence that walks in darkness,
Nor of the destruction that lays waste at noonday.

A thousand may fall at your side,
And ten thousand at your right hand;
But it shall not come near you.
Only with your eyes shall you look,
And see the reward of the wicked.

Because you have made the Lord, who is my refuge,
Even the Most High, your dwelling place,
10 No evil shall befall you,
Nor shall any plague come near your dwelling;
11 For He shall give His angels charge over you,
To keep you in all your ways.
12 In their hands they shall bear you up,
Lest you dash your foot against a stone.
13 You shall tread upon the lion and the cobra,
The young lion and the serpent you shall trample underfoot.

14 “Because he has set his love upon Me, therefore I will deliver him;
I will set him on high, because he has known My name.
15 He shall call upon Me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble;
I will deliver him and honor him.
16 With long life I will satisfy him,
And show him My salvation.”

Blessings,

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{For more information on Five Minute Friday click HERE.}

{ETF} Road – 1, Me – 0

Road - 1, Me - 0If I’m sharing the good, then I should also share the bad, and the downright ugly. 

Everything has been going along swimmingly. It was a good weekend and although not much driving happened (if any), we got a lot of stuff done outside and I didn’t feel the run back into the house at any point. Yay me!

So Monday evening rolls around and we need to take the garbage cans down to the end of the road. Great! I’m totally ready for this!

We get the trash cans in the back of the truck, and after making my hubs promise 3 times we were only going as far as the end of the drive, then just across the road to turn around, I climbed in the truck.

I was a bit what I call “antsy pantsy”. Not quite an anxiety attack, but on high alert with hand wringing and all. And I swear that was the slowest, longest trip to the end of the drive. Must’ve taken at least an hour (or a minute)!

We get almost to the road and I’m thinking we’d better just keep going and turn around before we unload the garbage cans or I won’t make it. Fine. Plans changed. The hill will make the garbage cans practically jump out for us anyhow.

The nose of the truck no more than hits the road and I lose my everlovin’ mind. All of a sudden I can’t think, I can’t breathe, and I’m convinced if the truck moves one iota I’m just gonna die right there.

And for some reason moving all the knobs on the radio is supposed to help (but it didn’t). Everything is happening in super slow motion (including contemplating jumping out of a moving vehicle). Hubs stops the truck and has his hand out to protect the radio from my violent button pushing (its always odd what you remember in those moments).

He calmly asks if it would be better to take the garbage out now and then we can turn around. Poor guy has the best intentions, “let her get out, calm down, then she’ll get back in and we can continue”. But I’m like, “Yea, right. Sorry, hubs. I’m outta here!” At the thought of that I bolted from the truck and about 1/4 of the way back up the drive.

He took the garbage cans out and I paced around trying not to die (like my brain has me convinced). After he turned the truck around, I was cal enough to climb back in (because that was obviously the fastest way back to the house) and ride home.

Once (safely) back home the flood of frustrations came crashing down on us like tidal wave. Because it doesn’t just have an impact on me. It impacts the whole family. And the frustrations are shared by all on some level.

Blessings,

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{You can read more of my struggle with severe anxiety/panic disorder HERE.}

{FMF} Want

Want{Five Minute Friday is a five minute free write on a prompt given each week.
There is no editing, no overthinking, no looking back. Just write.} 

This week’s word is want. Each week I look forward to the word reveal and how it will pertain to my life. “Where will this week’s word take me?”

Well, this word hits home for me this week as well. Since I have been setting up goals for myself, I am aware of all of my wants. These are not material things. These are not monetary things. These life things.

I want to go to town. I want to be able to travel again without this anxiety and without fear.

I want to be normal. Okay, well that is probably not ever going to happen…I hear normal is boring anyway, but I want to get back to a new normal for my life.

want to be brave, and strong, and courageous, and all the other wonderful words people have referred to me as this week.

I want God to use me as He sees fit. And I certainly feel as if He is doing so. He has pushed me out of my comfort zone. Out of my hole of (false) security.

want to go on a date with my husband. I want to go away for our anniversary.

want to go to the ocean. My very favorite place. Not just any part of the ocean. The spot pictured above (this was take the last time I was there, almost 2 years ago).

Blessings,

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{For more information on Five Minute Friday click HERE.}

{LST} Living So That

Living So ThatOh I am so over the moon excited that we started this study yesterday! I have done some great studies lately, but I have really been needing a dig deep study! And this book has all the promises of that very thing!

“In today’s world, it’s tough to make everyday decisions, let alone decisions that honor God.Our culture is increasingly driven by selfish desires. However, as Christians, our lives should not be self-centered and static; they should be others-centered and active, making a difference for the Kingdom of God.

Living “So That” is a fresh approach to understanding God’s Word, focusing on many of the powerful “so that” verses in Scripture, including Jesus Came So That. . .; God Spoke So That. . .; Pray So That. . .; Trials Come So That. . . . Through her approachable style, personal examples, and biblical teaching, Wendy equips readers to take what they study in the Word of God and practically live it out in order to impact the world around them. The result is a renewed appreciation for the power and applicability of Scripture. Through practical examples and biblical truths, Wendy helps readers gain a new perspective on daily living, equipping them to apply these biblical truths to present-day decision-making.”

I read part of chapter one today. We are taking it slow since the summer can be so crazy. As a group, we are doing one chapter every two weeks. That will give everyone time for simmer plans and to be able to really dig into the lessons!

It’s not too late if you’d like to join!

Blessings,

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{ETF} And We Went

And We WentSo, today, I took another brave step. I know I have been blogging a bit about my journey here, and posting some on my FB page. But my support system swindled, convinced, persuaded, explained to me that my story might help someone else. So I actually posted my last post on my personal FB page. And I am overwhelmed.

I have been in tears a lot of the evening. My messenger notifications have been off the hook! I am overcome with all of the “well-wishes”, “prayer warriors”, “I have been theres”, etc. It is amazing the support that has been poured out to me! I feel like I have a bit more fire in the tank. I mean, now that all of you are watching I can’t let you down now!😉

Now, on to our regularly scheduled post…

Today literally could have gone either way. I wanted to continue on the momentum from yesterday…and I also wanted a break. When hubs got home from work it was still hot and I was hanging laundry on the line. If you know me at all, you know I do not like the heat. So even though he and Ru were happily perched in the air conditioned car, I threw them a look and said, “Later.” They almost looked like hurt puppies, but they left it alone. (And I love them for that.)

We did some chores, caught up on our days, and had dinner. Every 30 minutes or so, Ru would pipe up with a, “Are we going for a drive, mum?” To which there was always an answer, “Can we eat first?”, “Can I finish my dinner first?”, etc. When dinner was over, I grabbed  my don’t-leave-home-without-it bag (I’ll explain that more later) and the dog and headed for the door. And out came my troop after me. They were not going to pass up this opportunity.😉

We got settled in the car and my heart started pounding. Hubs asked where I wanted to go and I told him just up the drive to the in-laws and back. And off we went. I swear it felt like he was only going 2 mph, although I know he wasn’t. We made it up the drive, turned around and were headed back. Hubs asked if I wanted to continue down the drive to the orchard (past our house), turn around and head back up again, or just park. Just looking down at the orchard made me dizzy, so I opted to just park. And we did.

But, I did not bolt from the car. I waited until the dizziness subsided and we even chatted a bit. I feel accomplished and not all at the same time. I mean, yes, I rode in the car with someone else driving and I didn’t panic. But seriously, I went all of 1000 feet.

But even a baby step is a step forward. We shall see what tomorrow brings.

Blessings,

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{You can read more of my struggle with severe anxiety/panic disorder HERE.}